Sunday, 1 July 2007

Change......

This is the first time I'm actually writing about 'touchy' things. Things that might reveal a lot about me, something I haven't done before. I'm a basically shy person. Too shy to make the first move, too shy to speak out, too reserved to let people know what I really am. And wierd in many ways. Which, though is something I actually proud of. I like being me. I like being different. Everyone does.

Things in life change. And for me, the last two years have been like a complete metamorphosis. Sometimes, everything seems to go wrong. But now I realize even the worst things that happen to you are actually good.

I shifted to Kolkata two years ago. I was in the 9th grade then. After having spent almost seven years in Bangalore, the idea of Kolkata didn't appeal to me at all. During the last few days at my school in Bangalore(I didn't really think those would be the last few days), I would fervently pray that we woudln't move to Kolkata. I didn't even tell all my friends there. I didn't even get a chance to say goodbye to my friends properly.

So I boarded the train to Kolkata, quite sure that I would return to Bangalore as scheduled, to my old school, old friends. The good old green and white uniform with the tie, assembly in the massive auditorium or the Senior Quad with the trees blowing in the breeze, and our principal blinding us by wearing possibly the most horrible shade of magenta or murky green one can find. And then of course, the gossip, talking about our latest crushes, bitching about people and the teachers, getting caught by prefects for wearing our belts too low(Man, that used to be terrifying!) and then banging on the desks singing 'WE WILL WE WILL ROCK YOU!!' loud enough to break the windows.

OK, I'm getting carried away.

So anyway, I got off the train at Howrah station to be greeted by my aunt and her new car. ;)
And I though it was going to be just another summer vacation.

And then, before I knew it, I was sitting in the principal's office at Modern High, being interviewed. I don't know how I passed the admission test with my horrible bengali, but to my utter shock, I qualified. Everyone was so happy - my parents and relatives and everyone. Everyone was congratulating me. I don't think I ever felt more depressed. I wasn't going back to Bangalore.

I hated school. Hated everyting. Hated the uniform, hated the horribly depressing school building, hated the weather. The old, broken, grey dilapidated buildings I would pass on my way to school would give me this feeling of unending gloom. The only thing I would look forward to every day was the phuchka eating after coming home.
This phase lasted for pretty long. And it was more my reluctance to accept the fact that I HAD to live here, that I had no way out, that made me take a lot of time to adjust and make friends.

And looking back I realize HOW MUCH things have changed. I don't know what I would have done if I hadnt been here. I'm being able to do things I've never done before, I've experienced things I'd never have been able to if I'd been in Bangalore. Two years ago, I'd never even though of imagining that life would be like this now.
Partying non-stop, 'keoraying' at various places, playing a lot of instruments, travelling around on my own wherever I want ;), hanging out, gossiping, meeting interesting people, blowing up the chemistry lab... :P
And the best part is that I've made the greatest friends ever. I couldn't ask for more. I'm loving life, just as I should. I'm having the time of my life!!

I know this sounds kinda crazy here, but I'd really like to thank all my friends here who've made life brighter for me. Thank you all.......

Oh yeah, and Heil the K.I.N.D. ;)

A quote I came across:
"Wisdom tells me I'm nothing,
Love tells me I'm everything,
And between the two, my life flows."

3 comments:

Neo said...

sesky post sis..rock on..

Who Said So?? said...

hey again!
well...being a beginner on writing about those "touchy" things you have actually done a pretty good job! And then again....your not the only person who likes to keep themselves reserved and still happy that they are that way!
And well....change! i think its kind of a bummer and well it does suck ( in the literal way) big time! but then again there is nothing you can do about it is there?? But then again like everything...changes can be good or bad! you've seen the good side! it was a bummer in the beginning but it is great now!Your lucky that it wasn't the other way round... :D

madhur@ said...

hey criusly cesky blog....nd yeah...heil de kind....nd heil 2 u too....luv u...