Monday, 21 December 2009


You absolutely MUST check this out.
Its brilliant and amazing and wonderful and incredible and unbelievable and [well I expect you get the point?].

Thursday, 17 December 2009

Start Of Something Beautiful.

Dusk. Dim orange streetlights.
Strings of song.
Skin prickling at the first touch.
Threads of rapidly crisscrossing thoughts
Flashing. Gone.
Eyes closing. Slowly.
Struggle of sense. Hesitation.
Sparking anticipation
Coming together
The moment.
Blurred and Beautiful.
Seeming to last forever
But eluding memory
The beginning -
No end
The start of something beautiful
Lingering on

Wednesday, 16 December 2009

More Yay!

Okay so I decided white is more my thing, black wasn't suiting me so I ended up changing templates again and I'm using one of blogger's default ones just tweaked around a bit to suit the Purlpe Cauldron. :). I love it. I'll keep it this way for a while atleast!
And yes I am so going to flunk maths. One day to doomsday. God Help me.
An yes I'm writing pretty regularly.
And the coffee is back. And I have tons of chocolate, like boxes of chunks of home made chocolates baba brought from Kodaikanal so I'll survive for a while. They have cocoa farms there. I'd love to own a cocoa farm and have a chocolate factory :).
Oh no I'm talking about chocolate again. I mean I shouldn't be doing that. For certain reasons.
[Okay Mr.Coffee I'm really sorry you know, I couldn't resist and I seriously didn't mean to - well you know the rest.] :P
But I just hope moody posts dont look chirpy because of the chirpy layout.
I mean I still write moody broody serious things. So please take me seriously when I write broody serious things. Well, easy to say that now coz I'm not writing anything serious or broody but hell whatever!
Okay I guess that's it for now(I mean its not really it but I have to say goodbye before I write too much nonsense and I need to sleep anyway).
Cheerio! :)

Sunday, 13 December 2009


So I finally managed to change the template and I guess I'll be changing templates more often, its fun. :). Oh and the cool thing is there's a 'search' option in the blog so you can search the blog for any keywords. Only problem is the font size is pretty small so it might look a bit cramped. But I like it anyway.
And maths is really frustrating the hell out of me, but Taylor expansion isn't as scary as I thought. But successive differentiation is much scarier than I thought. Phew.
I think I like blogging better than social interview on Facebook. Some of the questions are really lame, like 'what would so-and-so do if you tickled them?' and 'what would you do if so-and-so threw a water balloon at you?' and all that. Blah. 
I like winter. Its lovely to snuggle under the quilt and get your feet warm. And also it offers more opportunities to dress creatively. Like layers and hats and scarves and all that. Nice.
I've survived four days without coffee. There isn't any more coffee powder in the house. Tomorrow's a sunday and hopefully some shopping will get done so I wont have to struggle for existence. No really, I hate it when I badly want coffee in the evening and there isn't any and I have to make do with tea. I mean there's only so much tea you can drink. Ugh.
I swear I'm going to throw a party after 2nd year to celebrate the fact that I don't have to study math anymore. But thats a long time off. :(
I realized its been almost 3 years of my blog. Yay :).

Thursday, 10 December 2009

Time is all it takes.

I spoke to Maddy for a really long time today after a really long time. And like always, all the memories, flashbacks and unshared secrets came up.
And I think I can afford to give math a break for the evening so I got thinking like I usually do. Some revelations that made me go back in time. Little things that don't matter anymore, but would probably have mattered back then.
I've had an eventful life these past few years. I've seen a lot, experienced many many different things and learnt.
And over time everything changes. Fights, disagreements, struggles, overwhelming emotions you couldn't come to terms with. Everything gets ironed out in the end.
It still is difficult for me to accept some things or maybe I think that way just because of memories raked up. Sometimes I just don't know what to do, how to handle situations as they are now. There are times I still can't make sense of what I'm feeling which confuses me and depresses me. But what can be done? As of now, nothing.
But I know that everything will be alright later. Everything will be fine, ironed out. Things will begin to make more sense and I'll know exactly what I'm doing without being unsure of myself.
But it will take time. Time is all it takes.
This is life. :)

'Oh well, whatever never mind'

I'm not going to change. Because I like the way I am. I love the way I am. I like the things I do, I like the way I do things. I don't care if they're good, bad or crazy.
I'm a world for myself. I don't need much. I'll never go against what I want to be, not for anything in the world.
But I like change. I like trying new things, new ideas. I'm not rigid. I like to experiment. Find out what works best for me. Stick to what's best for me. But try other things. I like to fluctuate, oscillate.
I'm impulsive. I like to think. I think rather a lot sometimes. I wonder why I try to be nice all the time. Sometimes I'm not sure of what I'm doing. Sometimes I'm happy, sometimes I'm sad, sometimes excited, elated, frustrated, tired. Sometimes I just don't know.
But I like being me. I like everything about me and about what I do. And I'd never want to be turned into something else, someone who live my way. I wouldn't change for anything in the world.

Saturday, 5 December 2009

Strange Phenomena

I have my honours exam tomorrow and for some reason I am so shit scared I'm almost paralyzed and I cant think and I cant study and this has never happened to me before. I mean hell, I've never even been tensed before an exam. What the hell is going on? Like really, I'm so damn tensed and it feels like I've forgotten every damn thing and my head seems to not be working, like I don't remember a thing in inorganic. Everything is just gliding past me. Hell.
So I came online to try to relax a bit. Man I am scared. I think its the pressure. If you do well the first time people think you are absolutely the best and you always have to be absolutely the best. Family, friends, classmates, professors. And most of all myself. Its me whose been pressurizing myself the most.
I've changed I guess. I never cared about exams all my life, let alone get tensed. I mean earlier it would piss me off that I wasn't tensed before an exam like a normal person. I sort of wanted to start afresh now on the academic front because I was pretty average at school and yeah I'm quite pleased with the fact that I've made a start atleast but the incredible pressure I've got to get through to keep it going that way is something I realized only now. And the main part is, its a subject I like and I always want to be the best at what I like best. Sometimes I think I'm pretty lucky that I knew exactly what I wanted to do before making any wrong choices. And I'm getting to do exactly that.
And unfortunately, that isn't the case these days. In 11-12 everyone's so confused with all the options. And mostly because of the peer pressure they end up doing something they don't really want to.And there are a huge number of students who get into basic science courses because they don't get the ranks they'd need in the competitive exams to get into the institutes they want and its pretty bad for them because if you don't really like the science and you're forced to study it, its terrible. And actually the whole system's a confused mess because it isn't easy preparing for competitive exams along with the boards.
So anyway like I said, I'm lucky. And personally, I wouldn't study engineering if you paid me. Actually the only other alternative I could've gone for was medicine or biotech. But naah. I'm happy with chemistry. Medicine is crazy tough and biotech isn't basic science. And since I want to do molecular biology later on chemistry is the best option.

Sheesh I've written a lot. Feynman's writing is getting into my system, I think I'm writing like him. :-O
Yeah writing helps!

Thursday, 3 December 2009

So tomorrow will be the last bangla exam of my life. Yay. Uh, considering I pass that is.
I hope I pass I hope I pass I hope I pass