Friday, 27 November 2015


So I've been preparing to spend another holiday alone. It's thanksgiving, a time where families get together and eat a lot of turkey. Obviously, there is neither family here nor turkey (I'm not one to take the trouble to cook turkey if I'm eating alone. I don't like turkey anyway). It's just like any other day I spend alone except almost all the shops are closed including my favourite coffee shop. The library is closed. Also I know everyone else is having a great time with family or friends.

I guess sometimes you need to live your life and not wait around for people. It's important to learn to live alone, because there's just no other way. So I spent the day talking to people back home, catching up on Netflix (I finished Jessica Jones).

I went out for a walk in the evening. Somehow, evening skies never fail to inspire me. I guess sometimes we need this profound inspiration. It just made me rethink everything. Feel better. I felt more positive than I have in a long time. I played some songs I hadn't listened to in several years. Maybe it's the first time I really reclaimed a song. Made it mean something different. Because what it meant years ago no longer matters. It faded away, in the years in between.

I try to be in control. Powerful, impassive. But you don't imbibe that power. It comes from within. What you make of your life is upto you. You can sit around waiting, hoping, and then curl back up in disappointment. Or you can take control of how you want to feel. Some people say the vast skies make them feel insignificant. There is so much out there. Stars, Black holes, galaxies, galactic clusters, maybe more universes. But that does not mean you are insignificant. Because you exist. You exist too. You are part of the universe, the galaxies. You are made of the clouds and stars. And you have every right to be here, belong here. And you need to do it yourself, make yourself at home.

So there are a lot of things I am thankful for. I'm thankful of course for the people who care about me. But also to universe for being so beautiful and inspiring, because that's what keeps me going.