Sunday, 18 March 2012

A random happy sunday post.

I've enjoyed a weekend after such a long long time. Its the first sunday in weeks, maybe months that I'm not under pressure, having to cram like a maniac for exams, or break my head over s.o.p write ups or worry about filling and submitting applications or feel totally sick about an interview. It's also probably the last sunday in a few weeks I'll have so I'm trying to go easy on myself. Yes I have my final semester exams in three weeks. But I can give myself 2 days to breathe.

Its nice to wake up late, read the papers, chat and have a nice cup of late-morning coffee, help dad with a bit of his writing, actually listen to what my brother is saying rather than treat his endless chattering as background noise. Write, think, dream. I also had one of my best saturdays in a while. Saturday isn't counted as part of the 'weekend' for us because we have classes.  We went to watch Kahaani, which is one of the most wonderful movies I've ever watched. The last movie I loved so much was Dhobi Ghat. Well I don't want to write much more about it because it will turn into a full scale movie review. And honestly I'm a bit lazy to do that.

The realization that college is ending in two weeks actually hit yesterday. After we had finished watching the movie, eating, joking all the way on the metro ride home. And while I was walking home I felt a little sad even after such a beautiful day, because it was ending. And every moment that day meant a lot. It's like everything was magnified in my mind, every little stupid thing, things we do every day was more significant significant. Maybe that happens in the end. We all got emotional after watching the movie. Somehow it felt like our bonds were strengthened. In a mysterious, unspoken way.

I felt maybe I wish I'd gotten to know them better. Somehow I didn't manage to become very close to the people I hang out with. Except one or two people. I don't know how that happened. I just didn't open up. But everyone really did make up a significant part of my life these three years. I don't know if I'd leave much of an impression. But it's what I feel about it that counts and I'm quite satisfied overall with what I wanted from college life. I've been what I wanted to be more or less. I've lived up to what I wanted from myself at this phase and I feel good about myself and how I've developed and who I am.

Maybe something I will never get over is my impulsiveness and the fact that I want to do too many things. Like biology for example. I love everything there. So far I've been offered a developmental biology lab for Msc, but I'd equally love to work on the brain, cancer, strange and deadly viruses, molecular motors and machines that flip around and do cool things, artificial life and bacteria that live in godforsaken places like deep sea thermal vents and antarctica and foul swamps and survive on inorganic elements like iron and sulphur and arsenic.

So that's the end of my random sunday post. I like to write but I don't end up posting often. As usual I sign off with the promise that I'll write more frequently!