Friday, 24 January 2014


Just another one of those days I don't feel like doing anything, and am pissed off at everything and craving things I can't have and trying to write for days and days but not being able to make much sense. And then the moments of creative inspiration have been done to death, in trying to create something out of a random web of ideas, phrases, images, feelings and words.

I sometimes feel like I'm switching off from everything and everyone, one by one. It does scare me a little. But not a lot. I don't really mind switching off. That again, is a little scary. But from what I've seen, life is made of these different phases which are often disjointed, and you might as well accept that you can't have everything at once. So it's nice enough looking back at moments that were, knowing you enjoyed them, but that they are over and can't come back. If they did, they wouldn't be the same, and that would depress you even more. That's how time works. Goes forward, never back. And even if you could time travel, you would still be a passive observer.

I think writing spontaneously works out best. Have an idea, write it down. It's happened too many times that in the attempt to make something beautiful and perfect, I lose interest in the actual idea and it just gets wasted. And later attempts don't do justice to the original spark of enthusiasm.

Maybe I should just go back to reading Harry Potter. That works as a cure for everything.

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