This is some of the most beautiful writing I've ever read. I'm not usually into reading romantic novels, but Rebecca seems really amazing. It's very 'ME'. Actually I haven't read the whole book, but the thing I like most about it is the beautiful wildness it's got. OK, wierd way to describe it, but I can't find any other words for it. :P
So for the first time, I'm putting up stuff that I haven't written.
Last night I dreamt I went to Manderley again. It seemed to me I stood by the iron gate leading to the drive, and for a while I could not enter, for the way was barred to me. There was a padlock and a chain upon the gate. I called in my dream to the lodge keeper, and had no answer, and peering close through the rusted spokes of the gateI saw that the lodge was uninhabited.
No smoke came from the chimney, and the little lattice windows gaped forlorn. Then, like all dreamers, I was possessed of a sudden with supernatural powers and passed like a spirit throught the barrier before me. The drive wound away in front of me, twisting and turning as it had always done. ........... . The woods, always a menace in the past, had triumphed in the end. They croded, dark and uncontrolled, to the borders of the drive. The beeches with white, naked limbs leant close to one another, their branches intermingled in a strange embrace.....
Well, actually I don't have time to type out any more, even though the parts after this are wilder and more beautiful. These were just the first two paragraphs.
It's beautiful. Just beautiful.
Friday, 31 August 2007
Tuesday, 28 August 2007
Saturday, 25 August 2007
Dreams are real.
Dreams do come true.
So this is the first time I'm writing a story like this. In fact, its the first time I'm posting any story at all.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
They both were walking down a crowded street. She took a deep breath. "Can I talk to you?", she asked him, pulling him to the side. He was wearing a brownish hooded jacket with a dragon on it.
"*blah/blah/blah/blah*.. and then SJ said she'd made a big mistake ever agreeing to go out with him....yeah, what were you saying??"
She looked into his eyes for a second and looked away again. He looked too. "...I think I've fallen in love with you..."
"WAKE UP YOU'RE GONNA BE LATE FOR SCHOOL!!!"
She sat up in bed, shaking uncontrollably. The seeming reality of her dream scared her. She rubbed her eyes - her face was wet. Completely wet. It had seemed so real. So real....
She went into the bathroom and looked at the reflection of her tear stained face. She cried some more. She thought about the dream. Maybe it would come true. The question was when.
She realized thoughts such as these had been lurking in the depths of her subconsious mind. She'd never conciously thought of them.
Maybe it's high time....high time I did this, she thought. But I don't think I'm ready for it, she thought as she washed her face.
Dreams happen for a reason. Maybe this was a signal, that this was the right time.
She'd been waiting forever. Atleast it seemed like forever.
But the decision she made terrified her. How it would happen was the question...
She thought of her best friend ZY...she would always be there to help. ZY would be the happiest person ever to see this.
The busy day passed. Her mind was too occupied with life's mundane details to be able to think of her dream. Something she was grateful for. It seemed so trivial now.
She met them in the evening and told ZY about her dream, even though, at the moment it didn't really seem too important.
"We're gonna make it come true", said ZY. "Today".
"TODAY!!??? What???? I can't, I can't possibly do this!!"
"Its high time girl.....You've been in the dark too long....I'll make it happen. Today.", said ZY.
"Lets see what happens", she said.
And she realized what ZY said was true. She'd been hiding too long. She wanted to get over with it. She tried to plan it out but her mind wouldn't let her think about it.
She looked over at him. He wasn't wearing the same shirt he was in her dream. It was his usual black, not brown. Maybe it wasn't her day, she thought. ZY saw her looking and smiled.
They fooled around as usual. Joking, laughing, cursing the teacher...there wasn't any time for serious thought. She didn't want the serious thought.
They were invited to ZY's house that day. She told ZY again, "I don't see how I'm gonna do this."
"My terrace is magical. Believe me...something is going to happen today..."
"I hope..", she said.
She thought silently. She thought of everything they had been through together. All the times he'd stood by her. All the times he'd confided in her. All the fun they'd had together. All the intese feeling, that had appeared she didn't know when. She didn't realize she was so much in love. ZY was the one who made her realise.
She remembered the past few weeks. It had been a crazy ride. Pain, sorrow, insanity and then an overwhelming happiness. She'd felt it all. And ZY had been through it all with her.
She realized, at that moment, that this was what she really wanted.
She knew from experience that things can never be planned. They just happen. So for once, she didn't plan. She went with the flow, enjoying every moment of the mad fun they always had, just like everyone else.
There they were, at ZY's house. He didn't want to go up to the terrace, but she and ZY managed to drag him up there.
ZY was right.
It was beautiful. She looked up at the cloudy black sky. It was so peaceful, so serene. There were clouds so she couldn't see all the stars. They could see the whole city from up there - the lights from all the houses around made up for the starless sky. The golden moon seemed to smile down at them. They felt at one with the heavens. Here they were, at a place they could forget everything and just be themselves....
The three of them stood , looking out at the dark stretch of trees that never seemed to end. He and ZY stood on either side of her, chatting away. Something about the atmosphere made her unable to speak.
She stood there silently, looking down outside. Thinking. ZY knew what. ZY knew why. He didn't. Or maybe he did....
She tried to say something but she couldn't. She seemed to be lost in another world. She could just feel them standing next to her. And she knew they'd always be there...
"Hey, how come you're so quiet all of a sudden"?, he asked. She shook her head. He knew her well enough.
"She's thinking again. She thinks a lot sometimes...", he said. ZY didn't say anything. But she saw the tears in her eyes.
She didn't know where the tears came from. But there they were, rolling down her face. ZY hugged her. ZY knew. "What's the matter?" he asked. She shook her head again.
She was crying. She couldn't stop the tears. She cried not because of the pain, but because the pain was leaving her. Its was going - she'd be happy now.
He put his arms around her. She couldn't see, she could hear nothing but her sobs. She could just feel him...so close. And they didn't want to let go. That was the closest she'd ever been to anyone. She felt ZY's arm around her too.
She cried and cried her heart out. She had never cried this way before. Never. No one had ever seen her cry. He held her close and stroked her hair. She couldn't stop...
"Don't cry....tell me what happened"..
He was wet with her tears.
"Go on..." said ZY.
She tried to speak. It was the most difficult thing she had ever done in her life. She gathered all her courage, every little bit of determination she had.
And she knew she was ready.
Shee looked up at him for a second. The one person she loved with all her heart, the one person she could give up everything for, the one she saw when she closed her eyes, the insane feeling wouldn't leave. But her tears and her messed up hair wouldn't let her see.
".....I've fallen in love with you..."
The world seemed to break apart. The angels surrounded them, filling the air with their ethereal light, invisible to all but them. It all felt so peaceful, but so intense....the emotions can't be expressed in words. She was happier than she'd ever been in her life. She cried for joy. And she knew he was smiling. Maybe he'd known all along...
She could feel nothing else. She could feel him hugging her, and nothing else mattered.
ZY too had tears in her eyes. "I'm so happy for you - "...she hugged them both.
"But I wish I'd told him.....", said ZY, as she began to cry too. Love is painful.
"You two are so lucky....I wish I'd told him.....We'd been up her so many times but I never had the courage to tell him...now he's gone....gone.....And I know I'll never be able to fall in love again..."
"He'll come back. Tell him. Don't worry. He'll come back", he said.
"What if he doesn't? I'll never be able to tell him..."said ZY.
"You will. If I can do it, you can too", she said to ZY smiling, even though there were tears running down her face.
"I will. Just like you did today." And ZY smiled. "I love you all. I love you both...you're the best friends anyone can ever have"
"We love you too, ZY", he said, holding her hand.
She hugged ZY and they all hugged again. It was the most wonderful moment ever. The three best friends. They'd always be there for each other.
"She really loves you so much...", said ZY.
"Don't cry anymore!! It must be looking so wierd, the three of us all huddled up on the terrace, crying", he said, laughing. She laughed too. And after what seemed an eternity, they broke apart.
She wiped her tears away. She looked at him and then at ZY, and they smiled.
"Chuck Norris jokes, anyone?", he said.
It was time for a talk. Though as usual, he and ZY did most of the talking. Every single thing that had been happening now fitted in place. He understood. Understood everything.
She looked up at the sky again. The moon seemed to shine extra bright.
"We're going to remain friends forever", he said. ZY and she agreed. And for once, they all really meant it.
"May our bond never break", said ZY.
They all knew it never would.
That was one of the happiest days in her life.
Dreams do come true. And it's us who make them come true.
***********************************************************
So that is more or less the end of my story. Sounds quite common, but I still wanted to write it. The wierdest part was the dream and the entire dream scene being almost re-enacted. That's what struck me the most. It was in fact, the dream which made her tell him. If she hadn't had the dream, she probably wouldn't have thought of carrying this any further. It really is wierd how things happen....
So this is the first time I'm writing a story like this. In fact, its the first time I'm posting any story at all.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
They both were walking down a crowded street. She took a deep breath. "Can I talk to you?", she asked him, pulling him to the side. He was wearing a brownish hooded jacket with a dragon on it.
"*blah/blah/blah/blah*.. and then SJ said she'd made a big mistake ever agreeing to go out with him....yeah, what were you saying??"
She looked into his eyes for a second and looked away again. He looked too. "...I think I've fallen in love with you..."
"WAKE UP YOU'RE GONNA BE LATE FOR SCHOOL!!!"
She sat up in bed, shaking uncontrollably. The seeming reality of her dream scared her. She rubbed her eyes - her face was wet. Completely wet. It had seemed so real. So real....
She went into the bathroom and looked at the reflection of her tear stained face. She cried some more. She thought about the dream. Maybe it would come true. The question was when.
She realized thoughts such as these had been lurking in the depths of her subconsious mind. She'd never conciously thought of them.
Maybe it's high time....high time I did this, she thought. But I don't think I'm ready for it, she thought as she washed her face.
Dreams happen for a reason. Maybe this was a signal, that this was the right time.
She'd been waiting forever. Atleast it seemed like forever.
But the decision she made terrified her. How it would happen was the question...
She thought of her best friend ZY...she would always be there to help. ZY would be the happiest person ever to see this.
The busy day passed. Her mind was too occupied with life's mundane details to be able to think of her dream. Something she was grateful for. It seemed so trivial now.
She met them in the evening and told ZY about her dream, even though, at the moment it didn't really seem too important.
"We're gonna make it come true", said ZY. "Today".
"TODAY!!??? What???? I can't, I can't possibly do this!!"
"Its high time girl.....You've been in the dark too long....I'll make it happen. Today.", said ZY.
"Lets see what happens", she said.
And she realized what ZY said was true. She'd been hiding too long. She wanted to get over with it. She tried to plan it out but her mind wouldn't let her think about it.
She looked over at him. He wasn't wearing the same shirt he was in her dream. It was his usual black, not brown. Maybe it wasn't her day, she thought. ZY saw her looking and smiled.
They fooled around as usual. Joking, laughing, cursing the teacher...there wasn't any time for serious thought. She didn't want the serious thought.
They were invited to ZY's house that day. She told ZY again, "I don't see how I'm gonna do this."
"My terrace is magical. Believe me...something is going to happen today..."
"I hope..", she said.
She thought silently. She thought of everything they had been through together. All the times he'd stood by her. All the times he'd confided in her. All the fun they'd had together. All the intese feeling, that had appeared she didn't know when. She didn't realize she was so much in love. ZY was the one who made her realise.
She remembered the past few weeks. It had been a crazy ride. Pain, sorrow, insanity and then an overwhelming happiness. She'd felt it all. And ZY had been through it all with her.
She realized, at that moment, that this was what she really wanted.
She knew from experience that things can never be planned. They just happen. So for once, she didn't plan. She went with the flow, enjoying every moment of the mad fun they always had, just like everyone else.
There they were, at ZY's house. He didn't want to go up to the terrace, but she and ZY managed to drag him up there.
ZY was right.
It was beautiful. She looked up at the cloudy black sky. It was so peaceful, so serene. There were clouds so she couldn't see all the stars. They could see the whole city from up there - the lights from all the houses around made up for the starless sky. The golden moon seemed to smile down at them. They felt at one with the heavens. Here they were, at a place they could forget everything and just be themselves....
The three of them stood , looking out at the dark stretch of trees that never seemed to end. He and ZY stood on either side of her, chatting away. Something about the atmosphere made her unable to speak.
She stood there silently, looking down outside. Thinking. ZY knew what. ZY knew why. He didn't. Or maybe he did....
She tried to say something but she couldn't. She seemed to be lost in another world. She could just feel them standing next to her. And she knew they'd always be there...
"Hey, how come you're so quiet all of a sudden"?, he asked. She shook her head. He knew her well enough.
"She's thinking again. She thinks a lot sometimes...", he said. ZY didn't say anything. But she saw the tears in her eyes.
She didn't know where the tears came from. But there they were, rolling down her face. ZY hugged her. ZY knew. "What's the matter?" he asked. She shook her head again.
She was crying. She couldn't stop the tears. She cried not because of the pain, but because the pain was leaving her. Its was going - she'd be happy now.
He put his arms around her. She couldn't see, she could hear nothing but her sobs. She could just feel him...so close. And they didn't want to let go. That was the closest she'd ever been to anyone. She felt ZY's arm around her too.
She cried and cried her heart out. She had never cried this way before. Never. No one had ever seen her cry. He held her close and stroked her hair. She couldn't stop...
"Don't cry....tell me what happened"..
He was wet with her tears.
"Go on..." said ZY.
She tried to speak. It was the most difficult thing she had ever done in her life. She gathered all her courage, every little bit of determination she had.
And she knew she was ready.
Shee looked up at him for a second. The one person she loved with all her heart, the one person she could give up everything for, the one she saw when she closed her eyes, the insane feeling wouldn't leave. But her tears and her messed up hair wouldn't let her see.
".....I've fallen in love with you..."
The world seemed to break apart. The angels surrounded them, filling the air with their ethereal light, invisible to all but them. It all felt so peaceful, but so intense....the emotions can't be expressed in words. She was happier than she'd ever been in her life. She cried for joy. And she knew he was smiling. Maybe he'd known all along...
She could feel nothing else. She could feel him hugging her, and nothing else mattered.
ZY too had tears in her eyes. "I'm so happy for you - "...she hugged them both.
"But I wish I'd told him.....", said ZY, as she began to cry too. Love is painful.
"You two are so lucky....I wish I'd told him.....We'd been up her so many times but I never had the courage to tell him...now he's gone....gone.....And I know I'll never be able to fall in love again..."
"He'll come back. Tell him. Don't worry. He'll come back", he said.
"What if he doesn't? I'll never be able to tell him..."said ZY.
"You will. If I can do it, you can too", she said to ZY smiling, even though there were tears running down her face.
"I will. Just like you did today." And ZY smiled. "I love you all. I love you both...you're the best friends anyone can ever have"
"We love you too, ZY", he said, holding her hand.
She hugged ZY and they all hugged again. It was the most wonderful moment ever. The three best friends. They'd always be there for each other.
"She really loves you so much...", said ZY.
"Don't cry anymore!! It must be looking so wierd, the three of us all huddled up on the terrace, crying", he said, laughing. She laughed too. And after what seemed an eternity, they broke apart.
She wiped her tears away. She looked at him and then at ZY, and they smiled.
"Chuck Norris jokes, anyone?", he said.
It was time for a talk. Though as usual, he and ZY did most of the talking. Every single thing that had been happening now fitted in place. He understood. Understood everything.
She looked up at the sky again. The moon seemed to shine extra bright.
"We're going to remain friends forever", he said. ZY and she agreed. And for once, they all really meant it.
"May our bond never break", said ZY.
They all knew it never would.
That was one of the happiest days in her life.
Dreams do come true. And it's us who make them come true.
***********************************************************
So that is more or less the end of my story. Sounds quite common, but I still wanted to write it. The wierdest part was the dream and the entire dream scene being almost re-enacted. That's what struck me the most. It was in fact, the dream which made her tell him. If she hadn't had the dream, she probably wouldn't have thought of carrying this any further. It really is wierd how things happen....
Wednesday, 22 August 2007
Some more photos
[I've deleted the other photos that were there]
FEET! Belonging to Anushka, Arunima, Preeti and Ankita.
FEET! Belonging to Anushka, Arunima, Preeti and Ankita.
Sunday, 19 August 2007
Random pictures.
OK. I know I suck at photography so I don't really need any more comments on that. :P
The Devil Incarnate. :P
Sleep.
More outside...
The Devil Incarnate. :P
Sleep.
More outside...
Saturday, 18 August 2007
Blueness!!
It seems to be a 'blue' day for me. All I see is blue everywhere.
I got a blue bag, a blue wallet, another blue bag, a blue keychain, two pairs of blue earrings and two blue necklaces as birthday presents. The were sesky. =D
I gifted Anushka blue nailpolish.
The cover of that Concepts of Physics by H.C. Verma lying on my table is blue.
That textbook of Organic Chemistry I'm 'studying' from(Well, actually It's more for showing off than studying :P) is blue.
The chemistry book I'm ACTUALLY studying from is also blue.
Anushka and Ruvlina wore blue.
My diary is blue.
My school bag is blue.
The sky outside was blue.
The 'Save now' button at the bottom of this page is blue.
The whole Windows theme is blue.
My shirt has little blue designs on it.
My shorts are navy blue.
The links on Wikipedia are navy blue.
The dustbin is blue.
The dictionary is blue.
Well, I could go on, but I think it's getting monotonous. :P
So I better scoot! I have a massive test on organic chemistry so I better go back to studying from that blue book of mine.
Cheerio!
[I'm in a kinda jumpy mood today].
Thursday, 16 August 2007
In my head
A wild dream
An escaping scream
A bed of roses
And thorny bushes
The emotions flow
They just wont go
A war in my mind
Leaving my senses behind
Wednesday, 15 August 2007
The simple pleasures
Walking down a deserted street alone...or otherwise.
Counting the stars in the sky.
Sitting by the car window, passively watching the world pass by you.
Dreaming. Dreaming. And dreaming some more.
Writing.
Playing the piano.
Sleeping.
Curling up on a rainy day with an old book you've read so many times.
Smiling.
Laughing out loud like there's no tomorrow.
Eating chocolate.
Watching cats sleep.
Smelling roses.
Watching sunset.
A few of life's simple pleasures...just a few.
Counting the stars in the sky.
Sitting by the car window, passively watching the world pass by you.
Dreaming. Dreaming. And dreaming some more.
Writing.
Playing the piano.
Sleeping.
Curling up on a rainy day with an old book you've read so many times.
Smiling.
Laughing out loud like there's no tomorrow.
Eating chocolate.
Watching cats sleep.
Smelling roses.
Watching sunset.
A few of life's simple pleasures...just a few.
Sunday, 12 August 2007
Photos....breathe again.
These are some very beautiful photos my cousin took on his Gangtok trip. There are so many more but I can't possibly post them all...Enjoy. :)
Black n white...
Water and ice.
Snow falling through the dark sky.
Peace...
Far across the distance..
Black n white...
Water and ice.
Snow falling through the dark sky.
Peace...
Far across the distance..
Nymphetamine
While I was cleaning out my table I found an old scrap of paper with the lyrics of the song Nymphetamine by Cradle of Filth, along with my school time table, a few sums on vectors and numerous smileys.
Neo thinks I should listen to more death metal(according to him, death metal is totally 'tailor-made' for me - sexy synthesizers, black nailpolish). So he made me listen to Nymphetamine and wrote down the lyrics to that song while we were supposed to be doing problems on vectors like normal, sane people.
I really liked the song. It's got a haunting video, intense lyrics and a very gothic feel to it, so it actually does suit me pretty well. :)
It's surprising how little things suddenly bring back whole memories. And this is one of the most hilarious.
I remember, that day after he'd written the lyrics we started discussing wierd time travel theories [made by us, of course] and actually proved them using laws made by perfectly sane scientists [POOR EINSTEIN!!].. So finally we came to the conclusion that one could go back into another dimension by wearing a helmet AND that the bottle of water on the dining table was from some prehistoric age and may contain dissolved fossilized ruins of prehistoric insects, or from the future, in which case it was full of nuclear pollutants. And my father naturally thought we'd gone completely mad.
That sure was fun!
And then of course, tuning the guitar. It happened to be friday the thirteenth and Neo and I were trying to tune his guitar with his new digital tuner. We didn't really know how to use it so after messing around with it for a long time, we finally managed to learn how to use it. Talk about unlucky. We tried to get a G for about an hour but we ALWAYS ended up with F# or an A!! That was SO FRUSTRATING!! And it was the same case with the rest of the strings. So we gave up and tried playing Hotel California with the untuned guitar, but it sounded pretty horrendous. Though in the end we did manage to tune it.
Anyway, I'm listening to Nymphetamine after a long time....
Here are the lyrics.
Laid to the river
Midsummer, I waved
A "V" of black swans
On with hope to the grave
And though Red September
With skies fire-paved
I begged you appear
Like a thorn for the holy ones
Cold was my soul
Untold was the pain
I faced when you left me
A rose in the rain....
So I swore to the razor
That never, enchained
Would your dark nails of faith
Be pushed through my veins again
Bared on your tomb
I'm a prayer for your loneliness
And would you ever soon
Come above onto me?
For once upon a time
On the binds of your loneliness
I could always find the slot for your sacred key
Six feet deep is the incision
In my heart, that barless prison
Discoulours all with tunnel vision
Sunsetter...
Nymphetamine
Sick and weak from my condition
This lust, this vampyric addiction
To Her alone in full submission
None better...
Nymphetamine
Nymphetamine, Nymphetamine...
Nymphetamine girl.
Nymphetamine, Nymphetamine...
My Nymphetamine girl.
Wicked with your charm
I'm circled like prey
Back in the forest
Were whispers persuade
More sugar trails
More white lady laid
Than pillars of salt...
(keeping Sodom at at bay)
Fold to my arms
Hold their message away
And dance out to the moon
As we did in those golden days
Christening stars
I remember the way
We were needle and spoon
Mislaid in the burning hay
Bared on your tomb
I'm a prayer for your loneliness
And would you ever soon
Come above onto me?
For once upon a time
On the binds of your loneliness
I could always find the slot for your sacred key
Six feet deep is the incision
In my heart, that barless prison
Discoulours all with tunnel vision
Sunsetter...
Nymphetamine
Sick and weak from my condition
This lust, this vampyric addiction
To Her alone in full submission
None better...
Nymphetamine
Nymphetamine, Nymphetamine...
Nymphetamine girl.
Nymphetamine, Nymphetamine...
My Nymphetamine girl.
Friday, 10 August 2007
My Happy Ending.....
Beginning, rather.
A happy ending to a....well...not-so happy phase. And a happy new beginning. I'm loving life right now. I'm completely on top of the world. My life has taken a bright turn.
Happy endings can never be planned. Things just happen. You keep dreaming about how you want your happy ending to be - all the details, everything...But of course, things don't turn out the way you expect them. My happy ending wasn't exactly what I thought it would be, but it was very close.
Sometimes I really wish I could just relive that moment again. I was so oblivious with intense joy that I forgot what it really felt like. I was in a haze, everything around me seemed to disappear [Though that was probably because I didn't have my glasses on]....I couldn't see my friends smiling, but I knew they were. I knew it was one of their happiest moments too. What they'd been working for so hard had really paid off. I was in a dream.
I so wish I could feel it all again....just for the sake of remembering.
But I guess one can't have everything. But still, I'm happy.
So it looks like this is the end of my poem-writing phase as well. I've been trying really hard to write a nice happy poem to end it off properly, but I've failed miserably. I'm still trying hard, though! I really liked those poems I wrote. Even if no one else did. I mean, thinking of it now, what kind of a sane [relatively] person would like them? I realized only now how demented they ACTUALLY are. I can't believe I wrote them. Now it seems as if the last few weeks never happened....
So I'm on totally on cloud 9! I turned 16 yesterday. And I had an amazing party. The K.I.N.D is back. 'Sweet sixteen', eh? ;)
And this is the song that's been running in my head -
Truly, Madly, Deeply - Savage Garden
I'll be your dream
I'll be your wish
I'll be your fantasy.
I'll be your hope
I'll be your love
Be everything that you need.
I love you more with every breath
Truly madly deeply do..
I will be strong I will be faithful
'Cos I'm counting on a new beginning.
A reason for living.
A deeper meaning.
I want to stand with you on a mountain.
I want to bathe with you in the sea.
I want to lay like this forever.
Until the sky falls down on me...
And when the stars are shining brightly
In the velvet sky,
I'll make a wish
Send it to heaven
Then make you want to cry..
The tears of joy
For all the pleasure and the certainty.
That we're surrounded
By the comfort and protection of..
The highest power.
In lonely hours.
The tears devour you..
I want to stand with you on a mountain,
I want to bathe with you in the sea.
I want to lay like this forever,
Until the sky falls down on me...
Bridge
Oh can't you see it baby?
You don't have to close your eyes
'Cos it's standing right before you.
All that you need will surely come...
I'll be your dream
I'll be your wish
I'll be your fantasy.
I'll be your hope
I'll be your love
Be everything that you need.
I'll love you more with every breath
Truly madly deeply do...
Monday, 6 August 2007
Letting go.
I've let it all go
Once and for all
I don't feel any more pain
I hide no more
In my mind's dark depths
I've come out to face the light at the end of the tunnel.
I've let it all go
So it doesn't burn me anymore
I've found the peace I wanted
I am no more haunted
If it's over, let it go and
Come tomorrow it will seem
So yesterday, so yesterday
I'm just a bird that's already flown away
Laugh it off let it go and
When you wake up it will seem
So yesterday, so yesterday
Haven't you heard that I'm gonna be okay
I've let go of you
Because there was nothing left to hold on to
You've torn yourself away from me
You're heart must be made of steel....
You've become a zombie
Who can't see, who can't feel
Thank you... you made my mind up for me
When you started to ignore me
Do you see a single tear
It isn't gonna happen here
At least not today, not today, not today
But I don't need your sight or feeling anymore
I used to say I don't care
Even though I really did
But now I really don't care
The feeling I had's all gone
Leaving me in peacefull bliss
If you're over me, I'm already over you
If it's all been done, what is left to do
How can you hang up if the line is dead
If you wanna walk, I'm a step ahead
If you're moving on, I'm already gone
If the light is off then it isn't on
At least not today, not today, not today
But I'll be there
If you want to come back
I'll be ready to welcome you
With open arms....
I've finally let go
You're in my mind no more
I've moved on, just like I should
Venturing into light
No more tears
No more pain
No more hopes to be broken again
No more darkness
No more sorrow
I no more shirk away from facing tomorrow...
Sunday, 5 August 2007
Don't you feel..?
I hoped to see light again
But I've lost all hope now
I wished the sun would rise again
But for me, it'll always be dark
I wish I were still numb
I wish I couldn't feel
I wish the pain would go
I wish these wounds would heal
I've done all I could
I can say no more
Why do you hurt me like this?
Can't you see what you've done?
What are you, can't you feel?
Can't you see what you've done to me?
Are you blind to the pain?
Cold to the heart you've slain?
What have you become?
Why did you change?
Why did you change...
An end to my insanity
Is too much to hope for
I don't know why you did this
I don't know why you still do this
I know I've made mistakes
I try to set things right again
But you want to dwell in your old, cold world.
And I'm the one to blame
Can't you see?
Can't you feel?
All I want is the end
All I want is the old you, back again....
Friendship??
It's a wonderful thing...Everyone needs a friend.
When you're little, your best friend is the kid who sits beside you in class and shares your lunch.
Yyour best friend is the person you chase around your back yard and climb trees with.
And then you grow up...You realize friends mean more than just playmates. You learn to recognize people who really understand you. People you can share your secrets with. People you can trust. People you can gossip with. People you love, people you care about.
So that's what I think friendship is about.
They say a guy and a girl can't just be friends. And I never believed it was true. Life is never like it is in the movies - real life is way more complex. And somewhere in the way, feelings of friendship get mingled with love. And pretty often, people don't realize they're in love until its too late. And that's the saddest part. Maybe they're actually the same thing. Friendship is love. Love is friendship.
This is a tribute to all the friends I ever had throughout my life. So I'll take a walk down memory lane...
Esha, my first best friend. Co-founder of the 'Apple club' [yeah I still remember that]...That was way back in 1998. Doesn't seem that long though. I don't know where she is now, but I haven't forgotten her.
Sourav and Shahanaz - I remember we'd wake up at 6:00am to have cylce races....the nature club, the ghost stories, the old well in our backyard...I don't know what happened to them either.
Anita - My best friend since class 3, but we got shuffled in class 6 and got seperated. Our most memorable moments include listening to Backstreet Boys during lunch break and then of course, ghost stories..
Sai, Nisha, Swati, Aishwarya - I have so much to say, I could't possibly finish if I started, so I'll leave this for another post.
Anushka - My BESTEST friend!! Fellow freak, pianist, Tobey Maguire fan...I'll get carried away if I say anymore.
Arunima/Goru - The greatest advisor one can ever have.
Zomby - Needs no introduction.
Neo - My brother, best friend and about the only person who posesses the same type and same degree of wierdness I do! My partner in wierdness. :)
Deep - The completely MAD guy who makes life bright for me.
Rohan - "Welcome to the Hotel California"!!! :P One helluva rockin dude!! And one who never gets tired of playing Hotel California with me singin.
LOVE YOU ALL!!!
There are so many more, but if I start writing I'll never finish.
So this is all I want to say...
HAPPY FRIENDSHIP DAY!!
When you're little, your best friend is the kid who sits beside you in class and shares your lunch.
Yyour best friend is the person you chase around your back yard and climb trees with.
And then you grow up...You realize friends mean more than just playmates. You learn to recognize people who really understand you. People you can share your secrets with. People you can trust. People you can gossip with. People you love, people you care about.
So that's what I think friendship is about.
They say a guy and a girl can't just be friends. And I never believed it was true. Life is never like it is in the movies - real life is way more complex. And somewhere in the way, feelings of friendship get mingled with love. And pretty often, people don't realize they're in love until its too late. And that's the saddest part. Maybe they're actually the same thing. Friendship is love. Love is friendship.
This is a tribute to all the friends I ever had throughout my life. So I'll take a walk down memory lane...
Esha, my first best friend. Co-founder of the 'Apple club' [yeah I still remember that]...That was way back in 1998. Doesn't seem that long though. I don't know where she is now, but I haven't forgotten her.
Sourav and Shahanaz - I remember we'd wake up at 6:00am to have cylce races....the nature club, the ghost stories, the old well in our backyard...I don't know what happened to them either.
Anita - My best friend since class 3, but we got shuffled in class 6 and got seperated. Our most memorable moments include listening to Backstreet Boys during lunch break and then of course, ghost stories..
Sai, Nisha, Swati, Aishwarya - I have so much to say, I could't possibly finish if I started, so I'll leave this for another post.
Anushka - My BESTEST friend!! Fellow freak, pianist, Tobey Maguire fan...I'll get carried away if I say anymore.
Arunima/Goru - The greatest advisor one can ever have.
Zomby - Needs no introduction.
Neo - My brother, best friend and about the only person who posesses the same type and same degree of wierdness I do! My partner in wierdness. :)
Deep - The completely MAD guy who makes life bright for me.
Rohan - "Welcome to the Hotel California"!!! :P One helluva rockin dude!! And one who never gets tired of playing Hotel California with me singin.
LOVE YOU ALL!!!
There are so many more, but if I start writing I'll never finish.
So this is all I want to say...
HAPPY FRIENDSHIP DAY!!
Saturday, 4 August 2007
The Zomby and The Witch
This is a 'friendship day special' post.
'Against my will I stand beside my own reflection,
It's so haunting, How I can't seem
to find myslef again, my walls are closing in...'
The Zomby seemed like any other normal person....
The Witch looked and looked...and saw a reflection of herself staring back at her. She could see the image of herself in Zomby. And she knew Zomby saw her too. The same smile, the same mad glint, the same pain in her eyes...... The same laugh, the same scream, the same thoughts, the same feelings...
And that was the beginning of a blasting friendship.
Zomby is one of my best friends. She is my greatest secret keeper. She is about the only person who really understands me well, someone I can always depend on no matter what,someone I have stood by and someone who I know will stand by when the sky comes falling down. We have so much in common - we talk, laugh and think in the same way. We're even wierd in almost the same way! Really makes me think we must've been twins in our previous lives. ;)
She is my fellow-gossipper, advisor, counsellor, fashion consultant, fellow pschyco/wierdo and partner in crime. We complement each other.
We're the wierd sisters.
Thank you for all the great advice you've ever given me. Thank you always being there to listen to my endless crappy talks, and thanks for listening to my crappy advice. :P
From the non-stop phone conversations about love and life and its complexities to screaming at each other to study before exams, from laughing our heads off for god-knows what to crying our hearts out......'Sophisticated bitching' and 'sophisticated kaora' and 'sophisticated flirting'.. YEAH!!
We rock!!
Thankz a lot buddy!!
Heil the Zomby and the Witch forever!!
'Against my will I stand beside my own reflection,
It's so haunting, How I can't seem
to find myslef again, my walls are closing in...'
The Zomby seemed like any other normal person....
The Witch looked and looked...and saw a reflection of herself staring back at her. She could see the image of herself in Zomby. And she knew Zomby saw her too. The same smile, the same mad glint, the same pain in her eyes...... The same laugh, the same scream, the same thoughts, the same feelings...
And that was the beginning of a blasting friendship.
Zomby is one of my best friends. She is my greatest secret keeper. She is about the only person who really understands me well, someone I can always depend on no matter what,someone I have stood by and someone who I know will stand by when the sky comes falling down. We have so much in common - we talk, laugh and think in the same way. We're even wierd in almost the same way! Really makes me think we must've been twins in our previous lives. ;)
She is my fellow-gossipper, advisor, counsellor, fashion consultant, fellow pschyco/wierdo and partner in crime. We complement each other.
We're the wierd sisters.
Thank you for all the great advice you've ever given me. Thank you always being there to listen to my endless crappy talks, and thanks for listening to my crappy advice. :P
From the non-stop phone conversations about love and life and its complexities to screaming at each other to study before exams, from laughing our heads off for god-knows what to crying our hearts out......'Sophisticated bitching' and 'sophisticated kaora' and 'sophisticated flirting'.. YEAH!!
We rock!!
Thankz a lot buddy!!
Heil the Zomby and the Witch forever!!
Friday, 3 August 2007
Darkness
It's all dark again...I can't get this song out of my head. It's so haunting...Read the song and feel it.
MY IMMORTAL - EVANESCENCE
Suppressed by all my childish fears.
And if you have to leave
I wish that you would just leave
'Cause your presents still lingers here
And it won't leave me alone.
These wounds won't seem to heal.
This pain to just too real.
There's just too much that time cannot erase.
When you cried, I'd wipe away all of your tears.
When you'd scream, I'd fight away all of your fears.
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have...one me
You used to captivate me
By your resonating mind
Now I'm bounded by the life you left behind.
Your face it holds
My once pleasant dreams
Your voice has chased away
All of the sanity in me.
These wounds won't seem to heal.
This pain to just too real.
There's just too much that time cannot erase.
When you cried, I'd wipe away all of your tears.
When you'd scream, I'd fight away all of your fears.
And I held your hand through all of these years
but you still have...one me
I tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone.
But though you're still with me I've been alone out of love.
When you cried, I'd wipe away all of your tears.
When you'd scream, I'd fight away all of your fears.
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have...one me
Thursday, 2 August 2007
*LAlalalalalalLAAAA*
I'm in an absolutely CRAZY mood today!!! So I'm just writing a few random crazy things I feel like. It's nice to be back to my old crazy self again!!!
My hair smells good today. So that wierd potion I brewed up does work after all! :) But it still doesn't lie flat. :(
I'm currently singing 'Hung up' by Madonna. And I'm nowhere near a Madonna fan! Hell, I don't even know the words. One of my friends got it into my head today.
I love wearing multicoloured mismatched earrings. Current ones: purple and green.
I'm SOOO HAPPYYY!!
I'm SOOOO HAPPY!!!
And I don't know why. Which makes it all the better.
I got wet in the rain today. Really wet. It was amazing.
My friend Shabba wants to write a book called 'Biology, Boyfriends and Black nailpolish', which is apparently based on a girl whoes character is the complete opposite of mine, except for the 'black nailpolish' part.
I want to write a book about a magic world called Ira which is discovered by four friends - the entrance to Ira is through a gap between two trees in their school yard.
I burnt potatoes in the bio lab today.
I stole hydrogen peroxide and tomato ketchup from Shabba today.
I started reading a book which has tips on murdering people. Really.
I confused dopplegangers with the Doppler effect, but Wikipedia saved me!
I discovered that I'm good at drawing lobsters. And lousy at drawing starfish.
Paramecium reproduction is like kissing. They get 'attatched at the oral groove'. Hehehe..
I hate Enrique Iglesias. So my friends think I'm mad. Enrique is UNHOT. He cries more than he sings. What kind of a person would sing 'I love to see you cry'?? YUCK!! How obnoxious and sadistic!! Keanu Reeves is cool and Tobey Maguire is cute. And I'm tired of Tom Cruise and Daniel Radcliffe. Cruise seems to be getting shorter and shorter by the day and Dan seems to be getting thinner and paler by the day.
I'm not as bad at chemistry as I thought. 8/75 is one of the highest in class.
Zomby has an E.V.E exam tomorrow and she hasn't bought the book yet, and I of all people spent half my time shouting at her to study. Whoa!
I cannot write poetry anymore!!! WIERD!
Well I better be off now! Bye!
My hair smells good today. So that wierd potion I brewed up does work after all! :) But it still doesn't lie flat. :(
I'm currently singing 'Hung up' by Madonna. And I'm nowhere near a Madonna fan! Hell, I don't even know the words. One of my friends got it into my head today.
I love wearing multicoloured mismatched earrings. Current ones: purple and green.
I'm SOOO HAPPYYY!!
I'm SOOOO HAPPY!!!
And I don't know why. Which makes it all the better.
I got wet in the rain today. Really wet. It was amazing.
My friend Shabba wants to write a book called 'Biology, Boyfriends and Black nailpolish', which is apparently based on a girl whoes character is the complete opposite of mine, except for the 'black nailpolish' part.
I want to write a book about a magic world called Ira which is discovered by four friends - the entrance to Ira is through a gap between two trees in their school yard.
I burnt potatoes in the bio lab today.
I stole hydrogen peroxide and tomato ketchup from Shabba today.
I started reading a book which has tips on murdering people. Really.
I confused dopplegangers with the Doppler effect, but Wikipedia saved me!
I discovered that I'm good at drawing lobsters. And lousy at drawing starfish.
Paramecium reproduction is like kissing. They get 'attatched at the oral groove'. Hehehe..
I hate Enrique Iglesias. So my friends think I'm mad. Enrique is UNHOT. He cries more than he sings. What kind of a person would sing 'I love to see you cry'?? YUCK!! How obnoxious and sadistic!! Keanu Reeves is cool and Tobey Maguire is cute. And I'm tired of Tom Cruise and Daniel Radcliffe. Cruise seems to be getting shorter and shorter by the day and Dan seems to be getting thinner and paler by the day.
I'm not as bad at chemistry as I thought. 8/75 is one of the highest in class.
Zomby has an E.V.E exam tomorrow and she hasn't bought the book yet, and I of all people spent half my time shouting at her to study. Whoa!
I cannot write poetry anymore!!! WIERD!
Well I better be off now! Bye!
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